# Tuesday, 12/06/2022

## 14:13 making after college

I'll be done with school in a day… (more or less. still have a final to
finish, but that final's going to be inconsequential). Have a lot of
regrets and a lot of things I'd like to try next.

Ultimately, I over-valued some advice, didn't take other advice into
consideration, and didn't pursue what I thought I wanted - and what I'd
be best at. I undervalued participation in institution and the value of
professors, and realized the value of socialization too late to get a
ton out of it. Turns out that participating in institutions, clubs, and
organizations is incredibly valuable - as is putting in a lot of effort
to make those institutiosn successful. I underrated the value I'd get
and receive from those organizations and over-valued "cool" without ever
really reaching it.

Why classes? I took advice for skipping out of sections, then
comflicting advice to not skip, then ended up wasting a bunch of my time
walking around and doing things that didn't really matter - particularly
for the first half of college. I may have spent more time mocking some
understanding of work at a high level than actually spending the time to
understand it - and this is something I really regret. I undervalued the
idea that building a supportive community would help me build more,
thinking that I could do everything on my own and well - which was a bit
of a silly mindset.

Ultimately, "doing the work" and focusing on a reasonable amount of work
that I was truly interested in, under a mentor that I respected, would
have been far more valuable than fiddling in the dark with different
ideas and reading internet threads. I've learned a lot from reading -
and learned a lot about how to read and write about technology,
consequently - but I haven't actually done the work, and consequently I
don't have the in-depth understanding of anything, really, that I'd like
to have.

It's not clear that pursuing undergrad right after high school was the
best decision for me; working at CDK Global for a minute prior to
pursuing college may have made a lot more sense for me and provided me
better opportunities.