Journal entries in the last 31 days

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πŸ“… day [[2023-09-29]]
  • Friday, 09/29/23 ** 09:24 Specialized tools are good.

Camera roadmap:

  • Ricoh(s): everyday cameras.
  • Fuji X system: day shooting, video.
  • GFX (future): serious client, portrait, editorial work.

X-T3 is great. Upgrade to the next X-Pro when available. GFX tilt-shift lens is incredible. Would seriously transform my photos of buildings. GFX-50R ii, hopefully. ** 13:03 Internet history is becoming more and more difficult to track -- how do we archive all of those TikToks? Connect the links? I'm sure everyone's said the same about Facebook and Instagram, but - distressed. ** 14:39 hey

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-28]]
  • Thursday, 09/28/23 ** 10:59 I'm part of the problem. I save the same room inspiration as everyone else. My home will always look like everyone else's. ** 11:12 Taking photos improves eyesight ** 13:37 Maybe my bad mood is just about the weather. Finally finishing the apartment organization process. Coding well. Feeling great about progress today. Excited to do more and make more. I love work and life. This new camera is just what I need.

How do I prevent this from happening?

  • A fan.
  • Bright lights. ** 20:33 Issey Miyake (the brand, not the person... rest in peace) continues to make clothing that looks so different from anything else I've ever seen. Always blown away by the work. That clothing is art. How is nobody else doing it like this???
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-27]]
  • Wednesday, 09/27/23 ** 14:46 So much of writing React code is reconstructing state machines with particular primitives.

Is it better to use an abstraction like 'xstate' and rely on a state machine abstraction than to make it explicit? ** 14:47 I don't have a strong enough foundation to build a WebGPU UI framework thing. I barely even know what I want from a UI framework.

  • First: I have to continue building my personal website and add more primitives, more abstractions, logic for transitions. Get comfortable with my own workflow.

  • Build a couple of applications with Next.js or other 'state of the art tools'. Not splash pages or toys. Professional-looking applications.

  • Try building a mobile app or some sort of mobile interface for one of those abstractions.

  • Learn from using those multiple paradigms. Try to figure out what could be better. Try out those Rust Web UI experiments and whatever Swift is doing.

Only after doing these things will I be prepared to revisit all of that graphics rendering stuff!!!!!!!!! ** 16:20 I love Figma. Blown away by how responsive it is every time I use it. Can't wait for the experience to get closer to code.

Feels like user interface style systems should be redesigned 'figma-first'. Flexbox - and similar responsive systems - are great, sure, but we can add those retroactively. 'Convert to responsive component' or something atop of the mockup. So much of this mockup - any mockup - could be trivially converted to code if we had the right system, but this is only possible if the UI framework is tightly coupled to the design tool.

I want this to be real. ** 20:37 The Apple keyboard feels so shallow compared to my other devices; the huge amount of resistance that the X-T3 puts in front of my fingers makes these keys so touchy by comparison, with so little travel... being human is about getting used to our tools so quickly. Joel was shocked that I had a Swedish keyboard - but for me to adjust to it took no time at all.

Let's talk about camera gear.

I can tell that the Fuji's sensor is better - or that, at least, it injects some magic into the colors of each photo - and that's helped shape my style and take good photos.

However: those buttons are painful to press. It's genuinely difficult to change exposure compensation without reassigning a dial, and settings can't be quickly flicked into place; it's either one click at a time or a rough, forced transition for a very different setting. This is not the camera for fast photos.

I know the Ricoh wins, but let's break it down - I want a camera that:

  • Can be shot one-handed
  • Has IBIS to catch movement and enable one handed shots
  • Fits in my pocket or is otherwise unobtrusive when bringing it around
  • Has a versatile focal length
  • USB-C charging
  • Fast lens
  • Quick changing settings

Today it became so obvious how obtrusive the Fuji is - I have to keep it on the end of its 'leash' - camera strap - to guarantee that the image is stable, given no IBIS; the camera's a bit heavy to hold one-handed - tires my arm just enough to want a second hand sometimes - but that isn't much of a problem. Everyone around me reacted to me holding a camera; looked my way, gave me a weird look, tried to hide a bit, posed a little bit... maybe it's just imagined but the Fuji provoked a different reaction. This bus driver stared at me for ten minutes as I took photos around Slussen - and she wasn't even in the photos! I kept having to change settings and miss shots, too... bring the hand up to the camera or the camera down to the hand, make adjustment, repeat. Not a fun process.

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-26]]
  • Tuesday, 09/26/23 ** 12:00 Make more youtube videos. Produce more 'content'. DO MORE. ** 13:19 Missed shot - leather jacket in early afternoon light with a fly at the top right. Would have been brilliant.

Poor shot - experimenting with low shutter speed in Odenplan. Being afraid of taking a photo of someone close to me. Have imperfect results saved. ** 15:06 Employee at by:fiket - a bit of a goofy, outgoing character - awesome person - asked me how he could improve on making the mocha as I was leaving.

What an awesome idea - I'm so glad. I wish I had had more advice for him. ** 21:35 Photo learnings today:

  • Hold the camera as still as you can
  • Consider experimenting with manual mode
  • I love those shots of people in buildings
  • Discovering some dynamic compositions close to people
  • My movement can be good if I carefully consider what's in frame - learn to move the camera better adn control the motion
  • Most of the photos I want to shoot naturally fit with a longer focal length, and I feel like a lot of the time I am forcing the GR iii to do something it's not built for. It's a great indoor camera, but I'm still having a hard time forcing it outdoors. ** 21:38 Meta-notes on making videos and writing without thinking: it's okay for writing to be 'off the dome' because you see immediate feedback and correct it. This can be done in YouTube videos too - take a second to figure out the idea, say 'oops', control your pace, and figure it out in post.

In conversation, you have to control your thoughts and your pace prematurely. Take it slow. Think about it a little bit. Then slowly let the words out, word by word, carefully choosing the framework beforehand and filling in the gaps. ** 21:44 Also thinking about the best hobbies for learning how to learn. Photos are a perfect example. Barrier to entry is zero: literally walk outside and click a button. Barrier for feedback: super low. Post a photo on Instagram or send to someone else and ask their opinion. Community of practice: huge. Bad community of practice: huge. Really good people in modern day - a lot of them. Lots to aspire to do, can feel the huge gap, can clearly quantify getting better.

The tighter the feedback loop on your thinking can be, the faster you can learn and the better you can make things.

Gym takes a few weeks - I'd say two - to pay off positively with mood benefits. Eating takes a few days but is hard to directly establish the association. Photos are instant gratification: you see the image in the monitor and you think you win. ** 21:47 Thinking about what Fuji guy (sorry your name is in my phone but not on my computer) told me about composing on his camera - he just uses the black and white filter on the camera and uses the color RAW files. Intention is to focus on the composition in the camera then shift to considering the colors in post.

Is this good?

I think it would be a good exercise for learning. I'm not sure if it could help me make the best images possible. Color is so important to consider in a final image.

Should I force myself to shoot black and white jpegs for a bit and see what happens?

Should I bring back the Fuji focal length and see what happens?

Yes to the second. No to the first. I love color too much to give it up, and I love photos too much to miss an image because of a decision I made. ** 22:01 Why am I doing something that so many people are?

Walking around and crossing my fingers for shots is starting to feel frivolous; what am I really documenting? What is really what I want to picture? Can I really compete in such a crowded market? Am I really expressing myself? Is this really helping me meet people? Is taking photos a good use of my time? ** 22:07 More websites. There aren't enough websites.

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-25]]

Love his advocacy for joining the community - getting closer to others, not just borrowing elements from it or observing it. If you appreciate a culture you should live in it. ** 10:26 Thinking that once a week is a good rate for taking photos. ** 10:38 If I want to live more local, maybe I should use bandcamp instead then.

I appreciate the people who lean into the competitive advantages of taking photos - the ability to perfectly document an environment. Marketing work can be replaced by graphic design, 3D modeling, AI - that'll become cheaper. Recording progress, process, individual documentation - that's what photos are good for. ** 11:46 Yeah, I think Ricoh GR iii X is for me - I don't think the lack of weather will ever be a problem - but I also think my budget's run out. ** 12:42 To learn from photos

  • Shooting without the viewfinder, without the screen, without even looking. Being able to have a conversation without a camera, but still document a moment, is really beautiful
  • More interesting compositions. I messed up my photos from the event yesterday trying to square the compositions. They were just worse. Focus on people first - don't be too rigid
  • Shooting one handed. So powerful. Goes with the shooting without the viewfinder.
  • Working with people.

** 14:14 Always provide help first, then ask why, not the other way around - especially if it's something that could (or should) be prioritized. Nobody likes no ** 22:28 Thinking about livestreaming my daily photo editing or review sessions. Is that a good idea?

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-24]]
  • Sunday, 09/24/23 ** 11:14 Still feeling weird about the Ricoh. It's the perfect camera for living life. It's not the best camera - for me - for going out and taking photos. The lens is just too wide.

Should I get the GR iii X too?................ ** 19:29 Too much NYC mythos. Nobody needs another NYC street photographer - not in that style. Watching these videos - - a lot of the work feels like a copy of a copy of a copy - I don't understand where the work is coming from. He has some great photos - but not in this video. Maybe an unlucky day. The narrative about 'documenting life in the city' though doesn't feel like it adds up when there are so many people doing it?

Maybe what I'm doing is wrong too, directionless. I think it's more reflective of how I'm feeling than it is of others, or - at the least - more reflective of some theme I want to convey. What do I do it for? My instinct is to practice and keep practicing - it's not a hobby, really, it's a routine.

There are too many good photos - just like there are too many good songs and too many good websites and too many good graphic designers. (I don't think there are enough good websites or graphic designers though, really. Maybe video editors are a more apt comparison.). I don't think technology can make photos much better - we have tools today that expose the exposure latitude and dynamic range problems of previous tech generations. No camera from the last ten years has any limitations. Improvements are incremental - they decrease luck as a factor but make no fundamental changes in how things work.

There is room for different mediums that leverage the benefits of modern technology - we don't have a good camera for 'motion photos', to my knowledge, really - (or maybe I need to find one) - but it feels as if everything is trending towards video. Maybe photos are in the past. Every photo I see has been taken before; every idea has been thought of. There are new people but - as Chuck said in that essay - all of us live the same lives, really.

Maybe I should spend more time making websites then.

Okay - how am I different though?

  • My style - shot in a street style, but a bit sculptural, respective of frames and lines and architecture - is an approach that I don't really see other people using. I think I can expand and improve on it. I think there is merit to it.
  • I'm in Stockholm, not in New York City or San Francisco. Culture is different here.
  • I have a better understanding of technology than many others.
  • I have taste in clothes. Beyond what works and doesn't work for me, I have an understanding of how to style and dress to convey a particular mood. I don't know how to make clothing, but I keep up with new designers that make beautiful things that others could use to express themselves.
  • I have engineering discipline and tools for self-reflection. I will get better and better and better.
  • I have no connections to musicians and no experience with portraits of people. I need to do more here.
  • I have no experience in studio or with artificial lights.
  • I have no experience with interviews.
  • I don't take photos in the morning.
  • I don't need other people to care about my photos to make them. It just happens.

Cool - what can I do differently?

  • Take photos in the morning.
  • Take photos in the studio.
  • Try interviewing people.
  • Try 'street portraits' in locations I love. Spend time loitering and ask cool people at those locations for photos at those locations. This has worked for me before!! Working with people is something I will never get enough experience with.
  • Don't worry about a particular genre.
  • Consume more media from interesting, contemporary photographers. Watching all of this information about the NYC streets, I worry that too many people have the same influences and take the same photos. I don't want to become too tainted.
  • Keep consuming media from people who have different styles from mine.
  • Plan more.
  • Keep cold DMing. Cold DM everyone in Stockholm asking for photo advice. Cold DM anyone who wants photos. I need to meet more people.

I think reaching out is the best win I can get here. I do enough of the rest - I just need to meet people. Nothing's new. ** 21:02 Things to write about

  • Consequences of camera settings and how they can add to photos
  • Meta software development (not the company, the practice)
  • Day in life
  • Sweden
  • Fiction ** 22:16 Learning from riot photos
  • Take burst shots. No single photos.
  • Bring the bigger camera. Nobody will care.
  • Tell stories with the frames - prioritizing getting the lines straight over focusing on perspectives is too much.
  • Take more photos than you think you'll need - just point and hold the shutter down.
  • Slow shutter speed is great for showing motion.
  • Really wide focal length can show you down. Ricoh was not the best tool here.
  • Keep your hand still if you're shooting at low shutter speeds.. ** 22:59 I think I'm happier when I'm making my own work than I am when consuming the work of others. Finding references is good - but my life doesn't have the most balanced approach atm! I'm taking too much in and not putting enough out.

How much time is healthy to dedicate to 'input'? Depends on the medium, I think - but I'm dialed in basically 16 hours a day. There's no way that my current attitude is healthy.

More often than not, when I see something on that I like - I've already saved the thing to one of my channels and the person who saved it - why it showed up - follows me, meaning they likely found the thing from me to begin with. That has to be a sign to stop - or, at the least, slow pace.


πŸ“… day [[2023-09-23]]
  • Saturday, 09/23/23 ** 09:03 All these review websites - anonymous notes - etc. I don't think it's really possible for writing to be unidentifiable, unless it's been tumbled through editors and AI, or at least I think so; most people tend to have a strong voice. At work, I can generally identify who on the (9 person team) has written a passage based on their writing style, formatting, and other little hints throughout - a quirk of poor punctuation, a common misspelling, a certain phrase of words tehy use often. ** 10:13 The morning is for getting ahead - the evening is for cleaning up.

I think I will shift my workout schedule to the morning. It feels 'active' - not like 'maintenance' - and the last two hours of my day should be spent cleaning and organizing. In a way, everything I do feels like organizing; the code, for example, already exists; I just need to arrange and compose it in a way that solved my problem.

Maybe my plants need watering. Maybe I can do that now.

I think I have to accept that creating mess during the day is okay, too - as long as it's taken care of by the end of the day (or the next morning). I deserve a fresh start.

Talk at work yesterday - "You have to have a plan for when you'll end, or you could just work forever". That's my problem - I don't define time or space for me to do particular things, so I don't do much of anything and none of my time is reserved for me to accomplish anything in particular.

This is part of my effort to aggressively calendar retroactively - to visualize time spent is to take control of it. ** 10:51

Coney Island -- -- maybe New York City is the center of the world -- or, at least, one of them. ** 12:30 I write more words at work than I code - if you count comments. I think this is the correct approach ** 12:48 Forgot how good the Framework feels. The Macbook is robust - engineered- a beautiful artifact, a design machine, complete for people to use.

My Framework - with two years of NixOS, a light metal frame, and a few dents under its belt - is charming by comparison. It's a machine built for hacking, that begs to be remade and recrafted and redone over and over again, for debugging and hacking all sorts of beautiful system utiliteis and projects. The machine encourages you to remake it, transform it. It can do anything - you just have to make it happen and write the code to do it. ** 16:05 How do I format these notes as 500 word essays?


Wondering how I can make a system to help myself do the same ** 17:06 Loving the way the ilcaffe lights shake and move a bit when someone leaves their seat in the back - a trace of them is left in their place, swaying, lingering, for fifteen or so minutes afterwards. ** 21:04 I missed two really awesome photos today. One - woman in party gear looking down at Slussen. Two - woman immaculately dressed, looking very professional, flipping beer can above her head 180 degrees and pouring into her mouth alone - through the subway system window in Odenplan.

First one I was too scared to take - I was worried about being confrontational. I would not have been.

Second one - just didn't have the camera ready. I was too overwhelmed by the process of getting off the train to make myself alert.


πŸ“… day [[2023-09-22]]
  • Friday, 09/22/23 ** 02:22 Lessons from today's photos
  • I should ask people to take their photos if I want to rather than shying away from it. Own up to the fact that you're taking their photo- don't be ashamed of it. They either notice or they don't. Ask permission if it won't ruin the scene!


  • [[I got a new (second-hand) phone]].

  • Looking through the transcript of [[Kohei Saito on Degrowth Communism]]. [[Marx's theory of metabolism]].

  • Reading about [[system dynamics]] and the differences between the qualitative and quantitative approaches to it.

  • I'm using the RSS feed of changes to my digital garden (via Agora) as a very simple gardening tool (that is, something for improving the notes in my garden).

    • I add notes to my garden. Sometime later I see them in my RSS reader. I scan them. Often, upon reading, I'm then minded to tweak them slightly.
    • Not exactly a fancy [[spaced reptition]] system, but pretty simple and effective so far.
    • I'm thinking also to experiment with using my journal as a place where I revise key concepts in a spaced reptition kind of way. Just write certain thoughts out again and again until I feel they're clear enough in my head to leave them for a while.
  • Wheee I'm currently editing my journal from vim in termux on my phone. Synced here via syncthing. Not sure how much I'll need to be doing this but good to know that I can.

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-21]]
  • Thursday, 09/21/23 ** 10:04 not better - just different ** 11:04 The minute I get to new york, stay in new york, I'll be stuck there forever ** 11:12 I'm so lucky to have seen so much of the world at this age

though I haven't learned enough ** 11:16 Take more photos -- ** 13:34 Why did she give me two kanelbulle? ** 13:35 Maybe because they aren't very good today. ** 16:22 "If the best thing a photo has going for it is that it is technically difficult to get... it's like a musician showing off their chops, playing really fast, but maybe it's not very musical and not very soulful. A lot of photography now, taking single images trying to impress people who make single images .. " - Aaron Berger

  • debating if I want to start into baldur's gate…
    • I caved into peer pressure
  • People always smoking in the bathroom at the shelter and having the fire alarm go off in the middle of the night
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-20]]
  • "What you [[want]] is for your [[kids]] to have fun. [[Winning]] [with stakes] is [[fun]], losing is not fun."
  • Some states may require school districts to allow homeschoolers to compete in a [[school]] sport.
  • Wednesday, 09/20/23 ** 10:31 Some deliberate life improvements that I feel are significantly changing the way I am living life:
  • Replacing phone use cases with external devices. Phone should live in the back pocket, not the front pocket, and be used only as a last resort.
  • Pausing before speaking. An uncomfortably long pause followed by a well-reasoned answer is far more clear than a series of ramblings before directing someone to the right place.
  • Time tracking on google calendar. Now that I know how I spend my time, I can take steps to deliberately improve it.
  • Planning small time frames in google calendar ahead of time. Same reason - helps set goals.
  • Writing more and making videos critiquing my photos. I think these things already, but writing them down - making them real - voicing and highlighting these ideas - helps me learn to talk about work, advance its quality, and share my work with others.
  • Dealing with menial tasks by end of day - always. There is never not time for another five minute email in my life now.
  • Making a deliberate effort to take photos every day.
  • creating an app with native script is so much easier than native android development.
    • I'm trying my hand at flutter which isn't much better
      • flutter is actually kinda nice once you get the hang of it. it looks pretty nice
      • the startup time is kinda horrible, luckily it uses hot reload for code changesΒ 
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-19]]
  • In a [[story]], the people start as one thing and end up another.
  • Felt a camaraderie with every hustler today. Something similar in knowing what it's like to hunt for [[angles]] in [[grappling]].
  • Saw Tim at the gym. He said something led him there. Chores. Dropping something off. A road that led the [[gym]]. [[storymine]]
  • What's a process that will guarantee that people will [[sleep]] well? [[business]]
  • Go where the highest [[stakes]] are.
  • What do people need to know to deal with more [[heat]] than they are used to? [[business]]
  • Every [[story]] is about one moment. One [[time]] someone [[changed]]. The start, middle, and end are to get to that moment and then wrap it up.
    • What is the [[meaning]] of the [[moment]]?
      • The [[moment]] of [[change]].
      • Once, Alice was ______. But now, Alice is _______.
    • What is the opposite of that moment?
    • The [[start]] is the [[opposite]] of the [[end]].
    • Generate several threads for each start, middle, and end and then pick the one that resonates most.
    • In media res.
    • What are the [[stakes]]?
    • How to add or ramp up stakes?
      • Clear [[want]] and [[problem]]. collapsed:: true
        • A [[promise]] of what they will get from taking in the [[story]].
        • Start with a [[familiar]] [[want]], end with a strange new want.
      • Say something that will give the audience the character's [[hope]] and [[fear]]. collapsed:: true
        • Show what the audience needs to accept to [[feel]] what the [[character]] feels in the moment.
        • Have the characters present a plan so the [[audience]] feels like they are a part of a [[plan]], and then have to adapt to the [[problem]] when they face the problem.
      • Present half-bits of [[information]] about the [[end]]. collapsed:: true
        • What would let them [[wonder]] about what will happen [[next]]?
      • Take more [[time]] when the [[audience]] is in maximum [[tension]] and paying the most [[attention]]. Take very little time when the audience is not at that height of tension.
      • Have the [[characters]] make [[predictions]] that fail.
      • Put a [[camera]] in the [[scene]]- the [[narration]] should work like cameras in a movie. Situate the [[story]] in [[space]] and [[time]].
      • 'but' and 'so' offer a sense of [[change]], more than 'and' collapsed:: true
        • contradiction or multiplication
      • Make the [[big]] [[story]] [[small]], and the small story big.
      • [[Surprise]]. collapsed:: true
        • Distract during key information with other feelings- such as making them laugh.
        • [[Contrast]] what happens just before the surprise with the surprise.
      • [[Start]] with a [[laugh]] to get [[attention]]. collapsed:: true
        • If laughter precedes tragedy, it hurts more. Then make them laugh again, to dissolve [[tension]].
        • From Schwarzenegger: "Starting with something disarming and [[funny]] is a good way to stand out. You become more [[likable]], and people receive your [[information]] much better."
        • For triggering a [[laugh]], put the most [[surprising]] word at the [[end]]. collapsed:: true
      • [[End]] the story with [[yearning]].
      • A good [[story]] is about one thing only.
  • Check [[public]] [[domain]] releases every year.
  • Sorting through the thrown-up bits of [[sourdough]] [[pizza]] for [[glass]] or sand. [[Testing]] the grains on the window. [[storymine]]
  • [[Experience]] is the most valuable thing.
  • Penis allergic to vagina. [[storymine]]
  • [[Create]] things that people will [[want]].
  • Tuesday, 09/19/23 ** 09:01 Every night, go through the photos I took that day. Record myself going through the photos and what I thought about them. Upload to YouTube. Put it out there! ** 09:21 Nobody's content add is 'good video quality'. It always comes down to who is behind the camera and what - or who - they choose to take videos of - and their personality. That's why quality doesn't matter - micro-optimisation ** 16:23 Saw a headless pidgeon lying upright on the street yesterday in front of my apartment building. Dead - obviously. Thought about taking a photo of it. The bird wasn't there ten minutes later.

What happened?

Should I have taken the photo?

I should stop telling myself - atthe least - that I can always go back. It's a lie! ** 22:52 Learning that the Ricoh is a tool in a different way - the ability for a camera to go unnoticed in a tool in and of itself. Sure, I miss some photos I would have gotten if I had a zoom lens or had swapped lenses on the fly - but that would have drawn attention and tampered with the scene, something that a Ricoh gets away with like no other camera can.

Would I rather tamper with scenes if I had that power? Hell yeah. ** 22:58 Taking photos for me will always be about getting outside and spending time with people ** 23:01 Why does nobody making these YouTube videos where they take photos spend time critiquing their images? That's the interesting part - getting better and better and better every day. Learning deliberately from your photos. Learning to speak about your work. Learning to get better.

  • First day of peer training today
    • I have 80 hours of training this month
    • I'm not a fan of class work but at least I get to help people
    • I'm going to be working on the weekends after class. 40 something days ago I was living on the sidewalk
  • HuggingFace javascript libraries are kinda lacking. good thing python is growing on me.
    • doing ai on laptop uses a lot of disk space
      • correction, ai on laptop is impossible
      • I thought it was doing operations in the cloud but it's using local machine
        • so much for that idea
    • it's sad that only people with money are going to be able to leverage ai in the short term
  • this image is cute
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-18]]
  • A [[story]] shows [[change]] in someone over [[time]].
  • The Casper Tiny Business Book Club: a way to bring tiny [[business]] starters together in Casper.
  • [[Communities]] benefit from a fear of missing out, which come from [[barriers]] to entry. At the most basic level, [[time]] and [[space]] are barriers to entry. collapsed:: true
    • Nodes need a way to connect to other nodes directly. Lots of small gatherings are needed to make a bigger [[group]] healthy.
  • Questions to ask to find a [[business]]: collapsed:: true
    • What [[problems]] do people have?
    • How many people share that [[problem]]?
    • Who do people get [[advice]] from in that [[space]]?
    • What are their [[weaknesses]]?
    • Which [[distribution]] models are most effective?
    • What problem isn't being solved?
  • Kevin Von Duuglas-Ittu talks about "building a net with the world" to describe how competent Muay [[Thai]] [[fighters]] slowly stop [[movement]] in an [[opponent]]. This parallels "setting traps" or "creating luck". [[Position]] in an [[environment]] is used to [[block]] off movement for whoever is being [[hunted]].
    • "it is quite often a [[stalking]] [[game]] of techniques, exerting [[pressure]] on [[space]] and [[time]], until the [[kill]] can happen. At it’s highest, I suggest, it is 'building a net of the world'"
  • "It's not going [[fast]] that's [[dangerous]], but stopping fast"- also applies to [[throws]] and [[unarmed]] [[combat]].
  • [[Change]] creates [[tension]].
  • [[Sailing]] with the [[wind]] limits speed more than sailing against it because the sail acts as a [[parachute]] and the boat can only go as [[fast]] as the wind (rather than faster).
  • hips higher, square to the ground, spine aligned, between [[earth]] and [[sky]], be upright
  • "[[Magic]] only happens in a spectator's [[mind]]...focus on bringing an [[experience]] to the [[audience]]."
  • Who are the passionate [[outsiders]] with no [[tribe]] yet? collapsed:: true
    • Who's bored with yesterday and demands tomorrow?
  • When to take a [[slow]] bend, and when to go [[fast]] to float over a [[problem]]?
  • Things [[fans]] of Jack Carr talk about from his [[books]]: collapsed:: true
    • Nonstop action (how would one make [[written]] [[action]] [[flow]]?)
    • --some chapters are still considered too long for fans
    • Cell workout routine- a fan says they're stealing the character's workout routine.
    • People are annoyed with how many books seemingly minor plotlines take.
    • Funny glimpses to the author's worldview through the glossary.
    • You know the end (Reece will escape). You know the beginning (people have cornered Reece). People read to find out the middle (how?).
    • Hatchet patches- something for people to wear or display that shows that they are fans of the story. collapsed:: true
      • -A fan made a tomahawk to mimic the tomahawk used by characters.
      • -people are making breakfast dishes from the books.
      • -fans are wishing for the ability to purchase patches from the units in the series
      • -people are ordering watches that characters use in the books
    • "I have never felt as much [[anxiety]] and adrenaline listening to something before."
    • A reader has a feeling that anyone, including someone close to the [[protagonist]], could be a spy. This creates [[tension]]. Carr casts suspicion on someone close to Reece that Reece is putting all his eggs in- so the [[stakes]] are high.
    • Less politics, more ass-kicking.
    • Sucking air out of someone's throat underwater.
    • Reece's dad leaves him a note that suggests a puzzle. This puzzle is not solved until book 7.
    • People want to go to the [[places]] referred to in the book, even if they're not real- they get the idea that it is a reference to something real.
    • Who is going to die? <- creates [[tension]]
    • Redacted portion of the book.
    • How did X happen?
    • Most fans are [[listening]] to [[audiobook]], rather than [[reading]].
    • In the Blood ending.
  • Things [[fans]] of Heinlein talk about from his [[books]]: collapsed:: true
    • Quotes about the nature of humanity.
    • Quotes about political dynamics.
    • Introduction to alternative views on sexuality (polyamory, bisexuality, sexual acceptance).
    • Competent man as celebration of man.
    • A character who is what a male reader admires in women (freedom of embodied expression), followed by trauma closing the expression up. The reader cried on the scene about her having her lover come home in a coffin and hearing Taps.
  • Things [[fans]] of qntm talk about from his [[books]]: collapsed:: true
    • [[Worldbuilding]] doesn't overexplain, which gives it room to breathe.
    • "It's nice to get a story of [[existential]] [[horror]], in the face of vast and inimical entities from beyond human comprehension, that isn't just another Lovecraft pastiche."
    • Uplifting good vs evil end despite an extremely uncertain world.
    • Human feeling contrasted against existential alienation.
    • Endings that are touching and deeply personal, as well as with a grand [[vision]] for the future of humanity.
    • Putting human life into a galactic perspective and making the reader feel insignificant in a vast world.
    • Appreciating anti-fascist just-so stories.
    • Plausible explanation of magic (perhaps echoing Wattsian vampires).
    • Hard scifi magic (the paradox attraction thingy)
    • A sense of people getting punished for being confident (the protagonist gets punished)
    • Some things remain unknown, and unexplained.
  • [[Cold]] [[air]] = [[high]] [[pressure]] [[Warm]] air = [[low]] pressure
  • Monday, 09/18/23 ** 10:00 Thinking about the impact of wearing something that acts as a focal point for your identity. The huge camera shapes your day - who you are - what you intend to do with your day in a way that the Ricoh in the pocket never will. The huge accessory gives you a quest, a way for others to visually identify you and a way for you to talk to others about what you do that day. The huge accessory gives you a quest, a way for others to visually identify you and a way for you to classify yourself.

I think that sentence may have been duplicated.

This idea is reminiscent of Stephen Wolfram's laptop setup - propped up at his waist, ready to type, at all times.

The way that this device inconveniences you is a constant reminder that you /want/ to accept this inconvenience - that you're making a sacrifice every minute of the day to do what you love - and other people can see it; they can at least observe the mission you're going on.

This reminds me of going on a walk with a problem held in your head; with carrying a burden or task and idea that you're obsessed with, can't stop thinking about until you find an answer. ** 12:49 The only two ways I can ever imagine taking photos of people are:

  • Across the table from me at a restaurant or dinner
  • Across the room, in their apartment or mine

Maybe 40mm is for people and 28mm is for things. ** 12:50 The clothes that I'm wearing today feel too generic.

  • Black wool sweater
  • articulated pants
  • Sock darts
  • Bose headphones
  • Black tote

This outfit is consistent but not distinctive - there is no focal point for someone to remember me by. Nothing I wear tells someone else what I'm interested in. There is no band tee or tracksuit or football jersey to talk to someone else about.

My camera's too discrete now to stand out.

That's a good thing; the Ricoh can replace my phone. ** 20:56 Thinking about ways to more deliberately improve my photos.

I wonder if I'm using the right camera or the right focal length. I feel too wide in so many circumstances. The 28mm is just right for home life, for shooting indoors, for recording life day-to-day, but for walking outdoors - and expecting to find great photos - it's quite hard to use. Maybe the GR3x would be a better fit for me; maybe that camera would get me the depth of field I want from a friend in a cafe.

I'm not sure. I think the ability to easily and unobtrusively make more and more and more photos with a camera in the pocket is brilliant. I think having a large sensor with a high resolution is good. I think carrying a camera everywhere I go without any effort - and without showing others - is so powerful. A camera smaller than a phone is a beautiful tool.

How do I set practices to get better?

I can:

  • Walk through my photos every night, trying to get better
  • Revisit places day after day, perfecting the same kinds of photos. This gets boring really quickly and doesn't generalize to everywhere. Scratch that!
  • Keep walking into new places. New places will help you learn from old ones.
  • Try new cameras. The Ricoh is an experience I've really been learning from. We'll see how that process continues.

I noticed that the Magnum photographers take tons of shots of a particular scene - 50, 100, in a location - rather than moving on. I need to learn to stay in places longer. I'm out to take good photos. I'm not in a rush to the next location.

I like the idea of talking through and presenting my ideas to others. Is there a way to workshop photos with other people to improve deliberately? Try to find someone else to talk through photos with.

The curved lines of the Ricoh - and the way they show up in-camera - isn't fun.

On the bright side - I love the way my images of the Stockholm Library around the corner turned out. Wondering how possible it is to make more, similar photos.

Likewise - the hostel sign, the images inside my apartment, the subway system, the office - all photos that this camera was able to handle extremely well. This focal length is indoors and intimate.

Also - particularly in Stockholm - the focal length allows me to capture the entire facade of a building opposite me on the street and still have room for some action in the foreground. I didn't anticipate this. It's a useful tool I'll have to keep using as I wander around.

This was all basically what I expected when I purchased the camera; I shouldn't be surprised that it wasn't able to capture some of the tricky frames - like the woman through the white window on the green background - as well as I really wanted to. Maybe I have learned a bit about taking photos. I'm just not sure that it's best suited for my street photography work a lot of the time. I'll keep pushing it for the rest of this week - at the office, after work, and so on - and we'll see how it goes.

Decision: I am keeping the camera.

Will I use it daily?

I'm not sure yet.

I'll still try to take the Fuji out on weekends and longer trips. This isn't a replacement for those circumstances. We'll think about the GR III x though... ** 21:28 I like being able to pick games I don't want to play; to say one vector is good enough and investigate others. No subject is simple, but some subjects interest me less than others. It's okay to follow internet rabbit holes. Abandon the leaves that lead in the wrong directions. ** 22:30 Daily reminder that cooking is a gift, a privilege, and you have more of the best ingredients in the world - more than any other person has had available here at this point in history - down the street. Learning to cook is learning to love a process. ** 22:34 Instinctively I want to hate that I don't have the time to be good at everything in the world, but I love that I can fill in all of the gaps that friends and people I meet can't.

I just have to get as good at what I can now and meet those people when I can't. ** 23:23 I guess I just need to do more work.


πŸ“… day [[2023-09-17]]
  • Sunday, 09/17/23 ** 19:51

BLISS brand by uln ** 20:00 What in America isn't overdone, overperscribed, overused? ** 20:19 My phone is taking away from human interaction.

There are two things I use it for daily --

  • Paying for items
  • Using the subway

Both should be replaced with physical cards. ** 20:30 Why do camera companies feel like traditional tech companies - hype cycle, product nobody needs, release every year, repeat - rather than companies that focus on making tools, like Muji?

Ricoh is the company I've found that cuts closest to this.

Is Leica like this? Leica is inaccessible to anyone, so that's kind of irrelevant. Why would I buy a Leica when I can get a medium format Fuji?

Every other company feeds into the hype cycle. I wonder how expensive making a camera actually is.


πŸ“… day [[2023-09-16]]
  • Saturday, 09/16/23 ** 12:11 Every minor public figure in the world is one Instagram DM away from a conversation ** 12:16 Watching photo videos. Seeing beautiful shots in the videos that the creators don't take advantage of frustreates me.

Maybe I should go take photos outside.

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-15]]
  • Friday, 09/15/23 ** 16:55 I wonder if some of the people responsible for bringing the most joy to the most people are the people who run social media animal accounts ** 17:31 At a B2B SaaS company, the work you do day-to-day is not publicly visible unless you're working on marketing tools.

Make as much public work as you can in your free time to compensate. Don't share the same knowledge - that's a breach of contract - but leverage the same skills. Learn and do better. Improve what you do inside and outside of work with your free time. Work more and more and more when it's dark out. ** 17:35 Haters will tell you to avoid looking at the world's best work and comparing yourself to it. How will you ever get there if you can't understand the gap between your skills and theirs? Dive into the work of people who are the best in their fields. Understand what makes them tick. Pick another lane and do better.


πŸ“… day [[2023-09-14]]
  • Thursday, 09/14/23 ** 13:05 No architects are better at making use of natural light than those in Sweden. Every time I get to spend time in another home in Sweden - or any large, freestanding building - I'm reminded of 'In Praise of Shadows' - and the ways the light of a room is used - without relying on the lightbulb as a crutch - to fill the room and fill space. Natural light is so valued here.
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-13]]
  • Wednesday, 09/13/23 ** 14:11 I want a calendar and email and messaging system that 'cascades up'. I should receive everything in one inbox, but when I respond to something, that response is locally scoped to where it came from. That description is poor. If I am invited to an event for work, the response should come from my work email; if I'm invited to an event outside of work, that response happens outside of the work domain. Everything falls back to my personal account though as the root.


  • Read: [[The Magic of Small Databases]]

    • Enjoyed this. Thoughts about an indie web approach to curating and sharing and collaborating on small lists, indexes, collections.
  • [[Subconscious Beta]].

    • Been keeping an eye on it for a while, and I certainly like the sound of [[Noosphere]] and [[Subconscious]]. Collective knowledge management that is local-first and with data sovereignty. Discovery, feeds and follows of others is on the way apparently, which would be a great set of features I think.
    • It sounds kind of like a slicker Agora. But I don't necessarily use 'slick' as meaning 'better'. I love Agora's ramshackle and homebrew approach.
  • And I haven't come across anything from Noosphere that suggests it has any politics of any kind. The beta announcement is signed off with "Let’s 10x humanity’s collective intelligence", which, absent of any political direction, is kind of problematic to me.

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-12]]
  • Tuesday, 09/12/23 ** 20:46 Maybe taste is gone because people have no space for elitism, for cool. Maybe cool is now basic and people just want to know people - authentically - not as part of a performance. That's - hook - showing people as they are - embracing who they are - no dance jig or act up for the camera. That's who Fulcrum is. Authenticity is what really matters. ** 21:06 Sam Gellaitry's back - I loved him in high school. I didn't know he was in high school at the same time. I love watching people do what they love. I think I need to make music.


  • Swinging back to blogs and RSS feeds over Mastodon. The stream of info on microblogging sites is too much for me, and the signal-to-noise ratio is too weak.

  • Reading: [[The environmental impact of a PlayStation 4]]

    • "PlayStation 4 has the most dazzling and problematic parts of global capitalism purring in unison."
    • "It is an exquisite, leanly designed machine pulsing with the exploitation of Earth and its people."
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-11]]
  • Monday, 09/11/23 ** 11:53 Wondering if my differentiator is internet research. I think I'm quite good at assessing a community - and what makes that community tick - off of a social media profile and a name. I'm also decent at finding interesting people, things, ideas, those that aren't necessarily mainstream, maybe those that are super radical. What can I do with that? ** 13:18 Wondering why Warp doesn't take into account any sort of 'cd' result to determine the next suggested command. Hard-coding git commit -m <prompt> would be so powerful. I really want AI to write my commit messages for me.
  • my box isn't loading. I wonder if they're having issues. I don't see anything on status page πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-10]]
  • For [[handfighting]], it is often advantageous to get two [[hands]] on one [[limb]] and bring that limb across the opponent's [[body]].
  • Sunday, 09/10/23 ** 20:50 yeah i never put a bitch before my money

i love key glock

i been getting bag after bag after bag yuh ** 21:54 MacOS auto-update practices - in that most apps will prompt you to update or update in the background - have felt far more smooth than NixOS, where some apps just 'stop working', have security vulnerabilities, etc. because there is no path that allows users to push updates. The centralized management of the nixpkgs ecosystem is nice in some ways - I'm glad someone is managing security in a centralized way - but in some sense that's the responsibility of the computer. We need systems to be reproducible, too.

  • Been using gitpod a lot for development
    • It's nice because the machines are so big and good internet
    • They are ephemeral systems so you don't have to worry about machine specific unintentional dependencies
      • Is a thing a lot of the time in VPS environments
  • Started playing Starfield
    • pretty cool game, nice gameplay and graphics.
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-09]]
  • Saturday, 09/09/23 ** 19:31 Collect 1-5 second clips of videos on YouTube dynamically to document, to capture moments, to tell stories


πŸ“… day [[2023-09-08]]
  • [[Dick Thompson]] of the [[Vietnam]]-era [[SOG]] units noticed that North Vietnamese and South Vietnamese ate different food. He could [[smell]] the difference. So they all started eating North Vietnamese food. They also stopped using [[soap]] to shower- so that they would not alert North Vietnamese of their presence in the jungle.
  • Friday, 09/08/23 ** 00:19 New quest: make (design, sew, construct) my own uniform to wear every day ** 14:50 Thinking about brands 'editing things down' and turning campaigns into social experiences to make them feel democratized. As a video posted by Maybelline of the bus with a targeted ad and video with some silly words and people interacting in a studio, I wouldn't look again at this. Captured by a human with a phone, shaky camera, looks homemade? It feels like something tangible in the real world that I could participate in. Feels like fake democratization; the brand is still centralized and large and physical, but invited more user participation. ** 14:53 Jared - of BunJS - has such strong Twitter branding. No-nonsense, makes the product - and him - feel both social and hardworking. Gives hooks to connect - 'found on discord'. Clear sell and focused on just one thing. It's not a marketing schtick really, deliberately; it's a way for him to gather what he loves. ** 14:54 Wondering how a black and white monitor would change my design and development practices. Try it for a week. ** 17:06 I need a sanity check on my personal website to make sure this 'roll-from-scratch' approach is a good idea.
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-07]]
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-06]]
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-05]]
  • Tuesday, 09/05/23 ** 00:41

i want to warp a photo like im shaking a camera out to dry ** 19:43 80-20: Every day of mine is eight hours of software development work, two hours of photo.

  • I've been working on sqlite importer in agora-bridge repo.
  • agora-server now supports pushed nodes in PR
  • weird day because of monday holiday
  • I'm seeing people with sqlite databases with millions of records and reporting it's fast.
  • playing around with docker on gitpod.
    • I have a sql docker image for agora-server and one for agora-bridge in feature branches.
    • I have a third gitpod running a docker compose repo
  • Really liking my setup where I have github actions build docker images automatically for me
  • Now running my compose beast at
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-04]]
  • Monday, 09/04/23 ** 08:47 Once I figure out food, I win ** 08:51 I take photos to meet people.

To create my own worlds - to film to tell stories, not to document; to animate and model and make motion - is strange to me. I take photos to document, to preserve specific motions and memories and cool buildings and awesome people, to preserve a feeling.

User interfaces are different. I'll always want to make things that other people use, and crafting motions, experiences for others is invaluable.

Great stories are moving, but mine should be told through a lens of what I'm doing every day.

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-03]]
  • Sunday, 09/03/23 ** 14:00 I like vertical video because it represents what's in front of me, what's in front of my body. A vertical work is something I can stand in front of.

It's Sunday. There's work to do. I'll make it happen. Maybe I'll see the Stadmuseet too. The English translation is strange: 'Stockholm City Museum' because a 'Stad' is a state more generally.

  • Been messing around with which is like railway but allows more control over your instance
    • railway doesn't let you ssh in to debug server which is kind of annoying.
    • also has a lot of config options like machine size and such and has a toml file for config
    • railway doesn't spin up independent VMs though so price is probably cheaper across the board
πŸ“… day [[2023-09-02]]
  • Woke up by [[Bodensee]].
    • Will miss [[Flancia meet]] today as I temporarily don't have internet connectivity.
    • Will try to catch up later with people who were/are around! Apologies for missing it.
  • [[Flancia meet]] topics as I expected them
    • [[docker]]
    • [[agora recipe]] is running on [[coop cloud]], which is nice (this is what is serving but it needs some improvements:
      • It should be easier to override Agora settings from the coop cloud recipe proper, e.g. Agora name and sources. This could take place in the form of mounting agora.yaml as a config file?
      • It should be able to run one or more of the Agora bots which are part of [[agora bridge]] but currently not running for any Agora in
    • [[activitypub]]
      • Still unsure about whether to implement first-party support in e.g. [[agora server]], or to write a separate activitypub component (where? maybe in bridge?), or to rely on an existing implementation like the canonical golang one which seems quite mature and is geared precisely towards API usage (doesn't offer
  • #push [[What is the Agora]]?
    • I've been wanting to write a special node which acts as explainer to the Agora that should be accessible to the average (?) internet browser, in the sense of a person browsing the internet.
    • Node [[agora]] was maybe originally that but it has amassed a lot of historical content which makes it harder to offer a 'curated' primer experience.
    • I've also been thinking about this as a [[WTF]] button which we could render in red up top, with the milder tooltip 'I don't understand / what is this place anyway?'
    • Surely writing this would be an interesting challenge in the first place :) The Agora is many things, at least to me, and probably to all the people already in the Agora of Flancia; and it has accreted layers (meanings) as time goes by.
  • [[Jerome]] told me about [[Beaufort]] cheese yesterday.

As I sit here with my laptop (with [[vim]]) and no internet connection, I realize that I don't write here longform as much as I could. I guess the availability of the internet does make it easier for me to get distracted, which granted I see sometimes as a positive (it motivates a form of exploration), but might not be conducive to practicing the skill of writing coherently and consistently for more than a few bullet points in each journal.

The thought of writing in my blog again (meaning has come up a few times recently. I'm unsure; I like the process of writing in my garden, and how everything I write in it automatically shows up in the Agora moments later (at least when I have an internet connection). So maybe what I want is to embrace this space as a blog, and just try to write longer form alongside with my mainly outline-style notes, like other Agora users already do so beautifully.

  • [[todo]] maybe this weekend
    • Upload social media activity gathered by the [[agora bots]] to git repos.
      • This one has been in the back burner for a while and doesn't sound very hard.
      • It would also remove one of the main reasons to keep making full Agora backups -- which keep causing low disk space events in the Flancia servers.
      • All in all good bang-for-the-buck to start the weekend.
    • Fix hedgedoc
      • I think hedgedoc is not syncing to the Agora, the syncing process has some bugs at least -- while I'm dealing with 'git autopush' as per the above, it'd be a good time to take another look at this process and see if it can be made incrementally better.
    • Actually autopull [[etherpad]] or [[hedgedoc]] on empty nodes
      • I realized the other day this is quite simple; I tried this a few times in the past and ended up disabling autopull of the stoas because it can be disruptive (they tend to steal focus when pulled), but the disruption is really just because they are in the wrong position for empty nodes. Because empty nodes render on a separate template path, it should be straighforward to just embed the right stoa right there in the 'nobody has noded this yet' message, making the stoa onboarding experience much more convenient.
    • merge PRs
      • Aram's
      • vera formatting
      • vera sqlite
    • update journals page
      • formatting of the page is all different/weird
    • the pull of is broken above because of the parenthesis -- how to fix that?
    • update [[patera]] to something non ancient?
      • whatever is running on [[hypatia]]?
  • Saturday, 09/02/23 ** 21:53 This moment is the best moment to live in, to live through, ever. The next will be even better. I can't wait to take more and more photos of people and make better and better work. I'm starting to feel competent, and it feels wonderful.

I am also wondering where I'll ever find the money for that medium-format Fuji camera. Oh well...

πŸ“… day [[2023-09-01]]
  • Friday, 09/01/23 ** 10:16 Too much meta-startup work, not enough time spent building things and see what happens. Best people online are writing the 'here's how to do this' and 'i built this' posts - extraordinarily high-effort per tweet or share or instagram whatever - and it pays off. Don't water it down or start thinking about the 'meta-advice' until you have something to iterate on. ** 14:28 Clothes - I need to go brighter, bigger, cleaner, more friendly. Fewer logos. That light blue hoodie brings out my hair and eyes wonderfully. The color makes me happy. Maybe that's my future ** 18:57 Letting someone know that you've seen something already doesn't add anything to a conversation
  • Started working on wikilinks browser extension
    • It's a redo of an extension I was working on previously but now I'm using the plasmo framework which makes development and deployment to app store a lot nicer
  • Playing with cursor which is a vscode fork for AI
πŸ“… day [[2023-08-31]]
  • My first day on fourth floor today
  • Got called by impact nw which is an organizations for veterans facing homelessnes. I'm meeting them at their office on Wednesday. It's interfering with a job fairΒ  I wanted to do. We'll see how it goes.
    • I might reschedule depending on how I feel as it gets closer. They're just gonna do an intake so I feel like it could be pretty flexible.
  • I've been trying my hand at zig development lately. For the most part I like high level languages (javascript being my favorite), but sometimes it's fun to dig into the internals of things.
    • zig is oriented to replace c by using the c ecosystem as opposed to rust which is trying to create its own.
    • the memory management model of zig feels a lot closer to c
  • Found pdm for python today it's like poetry but feels more sleek and easier to use
    • python is kinda growing on me, I probably like it the best after javascript. low level languages like rust are interesting but I don't really need to drop that low for developing the kinds of applications I like to make.
πŸ“… day [[2023-08-30]]
  • [[Flancia]]!
    • [[30]] in the Flancia Pattern Language means [[flow]].
      • 6 means flow also some days and 30 is 6 * 5 so it makes sense.
        • 5 means [[focus]], so you can think of it as focusing on flow or flowing focusing, which to some extent may be seen as redundant (but doesn't need to be).
  • [[work]] was fine :) I'm settling into a rhythm of working until late with a break in the middle, and I enjoy it.
  • I attended to what I could of the [[fellowship of the link]], then a weird Jitsi bug that persisted across devices and internet connections locked me out! I couldn't see or hear anyone.
    • I'll read notes and try to watch the recording though :)
  • Wrote, thought, meditated.
  • [[bouncepaw]]
  • I thought I added stuff recently but maybe not. Thats the downside of using your own software, you're never sure if you broke it or not
  • I go upstairs tomorrow. I'll have a roomate. Not my first choice but we'll see how it goes